Cucurbita pepo

© 2016 KAYLA BALDA ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Cucurbita pepo

“Without going into any scientific exposition we must admit that light has quite as real and tangible effects upon the human body. But this is not all. Who has not observed the purifying effect of light, and especially of direct sunlight, upon the air of a room?” – Florence Nightingale, “Notes on Nursing.”

Trickled shadows fill my

ragged mouth with expectation, an infinitesimal weight; I:

didn’t expect

becoming

to hurt so much,

to mean a severing, to

growing thirsty, to

rotting under October moons. I:

can’t yet answer if illumination

justifies suffering. But

if you will let yourself recall

carved lightning scars and the Pumpkin King,

newspapers and crates, Sharpies and dull silver, bent backs, salted seeds—

at dusk, the way I shone and how you posed next to me in your Sailor Moon

sailor suit, how I

became shrouded in memory, in a million neural biographies,

flashbulb photography. If:

you let yourself recall,

can you tell me if it was all worth it? Can you

please tell me, because as the air chills

I’m afraid

for it to happen again;

you’re afraid

for it to happen again,

and I:

need to know if it is all worth it.